Thursday, November 7, 2013

SFW: This East Village apartment is 'sexy,' though we don't know why



Here's is a Craigslist ad for a pretty-average looking one-bedroom apartment. The headline describes the place as "sexy." Perhaps it is, though you wouldn't know it from the description:

New renovation

Perfect location near Whole Foods Trader [sic] and all transportation

Sun drenched with windows a [sic] plenty and Skylight

Queen sized Bedroom

Ample closets with Overhead stotage [sic]

Exposed Brick



And the unit is an unsexy $2,150. Any ideas why this is sexy? Or what, in general, makes an apartment sexy, aside from maybe the residents?

H/T @SerenaSpeaks

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

The fake wood, click together like Legos floors are always sexy!

Anonymous said...

Maybe it is sexy because you can put your couch right across from the stove and cozy up while your tater tots are baking? Just a guess.

EV Grieve said...

@ anon 8:18

Haha! Perfect! I can almost taste the crunch (of the tater tots)!

nygrump said...

Sexy because I can come in through the skylight while you are asleep and like an alien have my way with you, or whatever shit katy perry sings about

9:50 am said...

"exposed" brick. Hubba Hubba! Hey girl. Sexy.

Ken from Ken's Kitchen said...

What makes this apartment sexy? That's a good question. Perhaps some modern Masters and Johnson-type research can figure out what special something this unit has that aroused the sexual interest of the ad writer.

Anonymous said...

Cause whoever moves in is getting screwed.

Hey19 said...

This is a bait and switch ad, no one is getting this place for that price, I would imagine this place is 2,600 or so.

Anonymous said...

Tiny Is More Like It.

Anonymous said...

The heat doesn't work, so you must have sex during the winter in order to remain alive.

Eden Bee said...

IT IS CLEARLY SEXY WHY CAN'T YOU SEE IT?

HippieChick said...

Not sexy in the slightest. Sexy EV apartment = high ceilings, tin ceilings, original crown moldings, plaster rosettes around light fixtures, tub in the kitchen, original creaky wood plank floors, marble fireplace in the living room. Not to mention rent controlled!

BagelGuy said...

Anyone who call anything other than a good looking woman or man 'sexy' is a pretentious bozo in my book. Cars, food, apartments, sexy ? No. Deborah Harry circa 1976 ? Yes.

Anonymous said...

Coming Soon to a block near you -- Sexy Biscuits served in a froyo hoof.

pinhead said...

Of course I think you're sexy, apartment. This has never happened to me before. Maybe I'm just tired.

Anonymous said...

I'd totally tap that apt.

kayemme said...

You know what ISN'T sexy? Someone who doesn't know how to spell and post a listing for an apartment correctly. Also the rent. Pathetic.

Anonymous said...

Pathetic is the new sexy.

THE NOTORIOUS L.I.B.E.R.A.T.I.O.N. said...

My costume next Halloween? Sexy Apartment!

Crazy Eddie said...

3-4 NYU students in a one bedroom. Sexy?

Anonymous said...

This apartment is too sexy for my cat.

Wait, my cat disagrees, and what he says goes (you don't mess with this cat), so "scratch" that.

- East Villager