tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post8751654317401144348..comments2024-03-29T01:38:51.887-04:00Comments on EV Grieve: Empire Biscuit is hosting its first-ever comedy festival this AugustUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-27911874601685932902015-07-08T12:11:28.134-04:002015-07-08T12:11:28.134-04:00If the comedians suck, is the audience allowed to ...If the comedians suck, is the audience allowed to pelt them with biscuits?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-24809205934250995212015-07-07T22:42:37.927-04:002015-07-07T22:42:37.927-04:00Are we laughing with them or at them? Biscuits lol...Are we laughing with them or at them? Biscuits lol. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-72969780392477866842015-07-07T22:07:58.318-04:002015-07-07T22:07:58.318-04:00My cats are doing standup in our shower stall righ...My cats are doing standup in our shower stall right now if anyone's interested. No biscuits but all the Sour Patch Kids you can eat.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-9203375012398430142015-07-07T21:13:33.478-04:002015-07-07T21:13:33.478-04:00Nine shows, three nights, zero interest.Nine shows, three nights, zero interest.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-68190885625565896772015-07-07T20:15:09.709-04:002015-07-07T20:15:09.709-04:00"successful" sure, because it's fund..."successful" sure, because it's funded by mommy and daddy making it seem like it is a "success".Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-6983269642652396582015-07-07T19:54:19.618-04:002015-07-07T19:54:19.618-04:00And here I thought the biscuits were the joke!!! And here I thought the biscuits were the joke!!! paddy523noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-28633238336075356612015-07-07T19:18:53.767-04:002015-07-07T19:18:53.767-04:00...so when they finished I asked the naked family ... <br />...so when they finished I asked the naked family covered in filth behind the counter what they called those bloody, brown biscuits covered with sticky white goo? and they answered, "The Aristocrats." Thank you, thank you we'll be here all week don't forget to leave a tip it takes a lotta dough to make a biscuit. Sara Leenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-89109010515326690092015-07-07T19:05:11.130-04:002015-07-07T19:05:11.130-04:00They are one of our best examples of a successful ...They are one of our best examples of a successful restaurant that doesn't serve alcohol so let's support them in the spirit of not every single freaking place has to serve alcohol to turn a profit. <br /><br />But a doorman is a good idea, I hope they think of it. <br /><br />Also I think the mustache guy is gone. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-59492640234132098442015-07-07T18:26:33.026-04:002015-07-07T18:26:33.026-04:00I regretfully report Wakka Flocka Killah was attac...I regretfully report Wakka Flocka Killah was attacked by a corpse in the Ganges river. It mistook her boogie board for a seal. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-36827195196585069862015-07-07T15:59:15.827-04:002015-07-07T15:59:15.827-04:00It'll be funny(ier) if Liz Flock were to do st...It'll be funny(ier) if Liz Flock were to do stand-up there.<br /><br />Piss + Vinegar -- the new fad $22 cocktail to be served in the new trendeatery soon to open in a block near you.<br /><br />You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar; with vinegar, you catch biscuitologists and their ladies!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-34300067820280199552015-07-07T15:37:16.744-04:002015-07-07T15:37:16.744-04:00What do you think is in the biscuits?!?!?!What do you think is in the biscuits?!?!?!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-59079856886550673562015-07-07T14:02:12.286-04:002015-07-07T14:02:12.286-04:00With the rising rents, we can expect more culture ...With the rising rents, we can expect more culture like this! Banks offering sleep in after hours in their ATM lobby, with towel service; laundries turned into pop-up bakeries (you gotta do something with all that heat, so we'll make dri-cooled fluff puffs and pitch it as artisanal); and of course the huge amount of downtime for all those chain pharmacies can be marshaled to serve as after hours day care centers and senior hospice pit stops (the near proximity of baby wipes along would be a bonus to these drop offs).<br /><br />Really, the possibilities are limitless. But since we only have a limited amount of real estate, make the best of it.<br /><br />We're working on the next big real estate wave and it's happening now!<br /><br />-- a public service announcement from Ben "The Sledghammer" Shaoul, offering a bit of smart real estate advice to the lowlyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-91932506464054917172015-07-07T13:59:39.051-04:002015-07-07T13:59:39.051-04:00Not looking forward to people waiting on the sidew...Not looking forward to people waiting on the sidewalk for the shows. Hope they keep a lid on the noise- especially 11pm shows. And PLEASE DON'T GIVE THE COMICS A MICROPHONE IN THAT CLOSET OF A SPACE. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-53423960768873652942015-07-07T12:59:57.055-04:002015-07-07T12:59:57.055-04:00They've got so much extra space in there: EMPI...They've got so much extra space in there: <a href="http://s3-media1.fl.yelpcdn.com/bphoto/Zds8M7d8Trb8wBTxlhXA1Q/ls.jpg" rel="nofollow">EMPIRE BISCUIT MAIN STAGE</a>. <br /><br />This week, Comedy Festival. <br />Next week, a touring production of Cats. <br />After that, Monster Truck Rally.Johnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00286850413072642085noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-4295547857507134522015-07-07T12:55:10.676-04:002015-07-07T12:55:10.676-04:00This sounds like fun. I have seen comedy in laundr...This sounds like fun. I have seen comedy in laundromats and other weird places, but could someone from Empire give more details on how this works? Will there be seating? How many people can attend each show? Their space is so tiny. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-24902610420836347952015-07-07T12:51:58.414-04:002015-07-07T12:51:58.414-04:00Do you have a mouth? How long have you been waitin...Do you have a mouth? How long have you been waiting to put something in it comma like a biscuit while listening to the comedy? Your wait is over end user!<br /><br />If you are a demographic that likes to use your mouth to east or laugh come to the Last Annual Empire Biscuit Comedy Festival (LAEBCF).<br /><br />Not zoned as a performance space please join us for a show in a tightly packed and overheated room while eating a crumbling sandwich from the convenience of your lap.<br /><br />See you soon New Yorkers!Not Douglas Ellimannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-44916899006510239462015-07-07T12:26:41.177-04:002015-07-07T12:26:41.177-04:00Empire Biscuit: show some goodwill and donate some...Empire Biscuit: show some goodwill and donate some of the proceeds to B&H and Stage.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-24749780292586825242015-07-07T11:51:08.531-04:002015-07-07T11:51:08.531-04:00The opening sentences:
"How long have you b...The opening sentences: <br /><br />"How long have you been waiting to read a press release combining the worlds of stand-up comedy AND biscuits? Because your wait is over."<br /><br />Holy shit.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-20212473607514906722015-07-07T11:14:16.947-04:002015-07-07T11:14:16.947-04:00A lot of agents are about to get fired.A lot of agents are about to get fired.Zoltarnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-88332221016696800812015-07-07T11:02:55.842-04:002015-07-07T11:02:55.842-04:00I don't know if they can top off the way they ...I don't know if they can top off the way they Kickstarted and PRd this joint since that was a joke.<br /><br />Will there be security guards doing crowd control? since, gosh, the line will be long snaking around the block. <br /><br />Will the ladies get in for free? or at least a discount?<br /><br />Having a beard and a grin? Comp or discounted too? <br /><br />As the Biscuits TurnAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-41314643074678973402015-07-07T09:19:04.412-04:002015-07-07T09:19:04.412-04:00I'm holding out for the Fro-Yo Summer JamI'm holding out for the Fro-Yo Summer JamJAZnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5694390946037511355.post-30663520702931317142015-07-07T09:15:11.228-04:002015-07-07T09:15:11.228-04:00Will they draw inspiration from their botched open...Will they draw inspiration from their botched opening, ridiculous marketing, and Perma Grin's mustache?!?!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com