Tuesday, May 28, 2013

A classic Urban Etiquette Sign for the 'Birthday Girl on the Second Floor'



A tipster points us to the front door at 500 E. 11th Street at Avenue A.

Per the tipster: "As if the residents of this building weren't suffering enough from Kushner and 7-11 construction..."


[Click image to enlarge]

The sign reads in part:

"We understand that you may be on a different schedule than many of us, but we're not playing our music out of our windows when you're sleeping. No, we have an understanding of what it means to be a neighbor. This is not a dormitory (although, the changing nature of the East Village may, at times, look and sound otherwise)."

Pretty good! But will it actually do a bit of good? According to the tipster: "This is the second time a letter was posted pleading with said tenant to play nice."

31 comments:

  1. "we're are willing to start a collection to buy you headphones" lmao

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  2. Do you know who the landlord is? Try contacting the landlord about this tenant. The roof parties might get him to do something about her. I know my landlord doesn't want anyone on the roof because of the liability issues.

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  3. Absolutely, notify the landlord and call 311 between 11 pm and 2 am, after that you could start calling the precinct...

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  4. You know how puzzling the Murder on the Orient Express was to Hercule Poirot? He was looking for a 'killer', when it actuality practically everyone on the train joined in on the deed.

    This might call for a group effort. In lieu of anything as extreme as the above, perhaps a simple series of 'warnings' may do the trick. Just to put the fear of God into the little creep.

    Fairly witty notes (of a length that this person would never have the patience or ability to read) are not going to do it.

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  5. Agreed, notes don't work. That is an adult/parent reaction that only makes the culprit feel more rebellious.

    My noisy neighbor used to play his guitar until 5 am. Confrontations only made him bolder. So every morning when I left for work, I hit his buzzer. Once, I taped the buzzer down and walked away.

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  6. Calling 311 absolutely works!

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  7. I agree that these 5-paragraph, slightly too-clever-for-their-own-good letters never work. I'm thinking huge block letters that read SHUT THE FUCK UP would be more effective, but we all hate to turn into that hostile person, even when it's justified. Many, many times I have wanted to put STOP SLAMMING THE FUCKING DOORS! signs up in my building, but I hate the idea that these people would turn me into "that person."

    Just call the landlord/311 and remember that she'll probably not even be living there three months from now.

    Good luck, 500 11th

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  8. So many rude people! Next you'll be saying she can't smoke pot in the hallway or keep a fresh pair of underwear in the lobby tree. #hatersgonnahate

    .|. <-- I made a peen

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  9. To John M.: As the writer of this note (and the previous one), I have to agree with you: It most likely won't make a difference. The pleading, coaxing, urging, and yelling didn't work; so, at 2:00 p.m., I tried another method. Yes, I doubt it'll work, but I needed to try something else. It's a terrible situation for several apartments and families... And I just found out from my landlord that these seeming "teenagers" were kicked out of their previous apartment. I wonder why?

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  10. Will have to be THE hip-now headphones...and in an appropriate color....and, right, she'll need about twenty pairs with the appropriate wireless gear....

    Good luck!

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  11. No, this calls for a photo of the culprit posted in the building lobby, so that everyone who passes her in the hallway can say hello... or whatever. Public embarassment always works better than scorn.

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  12. @ Not Amanda Bynes- Oooh! I want a tree in my lobby!

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  13. We did complain to Kushner's management company. They're located on 12th St. where Rawvolution used to be. They said they knew but apparently did nothing, because the next night was double the amount of party-goers and triple the ridiculous volume of the "birthday girl." They also said something about the landlord's daughter living in the building. News to me.

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  14. So sorry you have to deal with this. I live behind you on 12th Street and have to listen to all of the "birthday girls" who hoot and holler in and in front of Doublewide all night. It's unbearable.

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  15. I love how sometimes it's "This is NYC! If you can't stand the noise leave!" and sometimes it's "People live and work here! Be quiet and respectful!"

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  16. Joe Yoga,

    Good point. It takes a while to separate Anonymous A from Anonymous B!

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  17. Lobby trees are the shizz! U can keep so many things in there... spare keys, banking passwords, the neighbors cat you stole by accident. They have em at Home Deport so bring a long wig and hide a yucca under that and say it's Lady Gaga. Ma boyz won't mess with you.

    THE NOTORIOUS B.Y.N.E.S.

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  18. why do they post this on the front door as opposed to merely the offender's door? Pathological.

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  19. I had a neighbor at one point that put her speakers in the air shaft so her sister who lived 2 floors above could enjoy the music. When confronted she only became more belligerent. Finally I fought fire with fire and put on Horst's Planet on continuous play with the speakers pointed into the airshaft and left the building for about an hour. She FINALLY got the message. Sometimes words do not work. You're obviously NOT dealing with a mature, considerate individual.

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  20. @LWESTER - I did that same thing with the Ramones' first album, Side 1, on automatic replay. I'd leave for work at 8 AM with the speakers directly against my neighbor's wall, get home 12 hours later, and it would still be playing. They moved out after a couple of months. Hey! Ho! Let's GO!

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  21. in the mid-nineties, i interviewed for a job with the dance label strictly rhythm. at the interview, they gave me a bunch of cds, including the almost 10 minute long "fever" mix of george acosta's planet soul hit, "set u free." this is the kind of techno that's pretty stripped down and 90% base. the kind that you can hear from two blocks away on a car stereo.

    a few years later, when some nyu frat boys moved in upstairs from me, i tolerated their clodding steps overhead and their loud, drunk banter at 2 a.m.

    but then, on new years' day, when at 2 p.m. i cranked up some tunes, the frat boys pounded on the floor and wouldn't stop... i guess in their world, it's impolite to play music before the neighbors' hangovers have worn off.

    then it happened again.

    and again.

    finally, i came up with a solution. the next time they pounded on my floor DURING THE DAYTIME because i was playing my stereo and they were still sleeping off the night before, i put that "set u free" cd on repeat, set the volume to 8, pointed the speakers to the ceiling, and left the apartment.

    (for an idea of the effect, have a quick listen here: http://youtu.be/9RtcMZGFgos)

    i had to do it again, but i promise you, they didn't pound on my floor a third time.

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  22. Who are these landlords people speak of who care about resolving complaints as formidable as a nuisance tenant. Yet to ever meet someone who had such an experience.

    Interestingly my robot word is "tenants."

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  23. My landlord has tried to reign in disruptive tenants. His efforts don't always work, but he tries.

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  24. If people are up on the roof (implicitly permitted by landlord or not) the parapets must be higher than about 3'. S you call 311 to file a complaint with Dept of Buildings. You will be connected with DOB. tell them that there are tenants/parties on the roof, that there have been improvements to the roof wo raising the parapet. The landlord will then prevent tenants from using the roof because it costs a lot to raise the parapet.

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  25. My girlfriend won't let me use my real nameMay 29, 2013 at 12:40 AM

    I don't know why all of you are being so polite with these twerps. I've been living in the East Village nearly 30 years and whenever shit like this happens I just grab my baseball bat and go and knock on their door and when they open it I introduce myself and say "the party's over now".

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  26. . . . an adult/parent reaction that only makes the culprit feel more rebellious . . .

    Nonetheless, that note is a beautiful act of public love. If it only works once in a dozen times, it's still efficient.

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  27. Occasionally i had the same problem when i was on Clinton St in the late 1990s and early 2000s. The note is useless, she just laughed at you when she read it. Here's what you do:

    1) Call 311 to report the noise. It takes them a while to respond so in the meantime-

    2) Go over to the party, preferably not wearing a shirt or shoes. When the door opens say - "enough all fu--ing' ready. Shut the f--k up, i got to work tomorrow." (it helps if you have some size and a NY accent). Then -

    2) Get up at 6:30am and place a pin in their buzzer. Do this off and on for a few weeks.

    In other words, prove you can be a bigger a-hole then they can.

    Also, if anyone ever said to me, while blasing music on a Tues at 3:30 am, "If you don't like noise why do you live in the city?" My head might just explode.

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  28. All these comments are great, but what if the serial offender is the super who has people over for bbq parties in the backyard every summer weekend until 2am?

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  29. If you think Mr. Ivanka cares about the tenants you are nuts. They won't even keep the electricity on in this building or have a clue about all the illegal shit the contractor is doing building out that 7-11. The super looks dumbfounded all the time and mostly just stands around answering his never ending ringing phone lying to every caller that he's on his way over. 311 only works if the landlord cares.. It takes weeks for someone to come file the official inspection, and then most of the time it's dismissed because the govt worker doesn't even try to get access to the building. And if the thing isn't fixed? The fines are pocket change.

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  30. I'm the guy from Clinton St (above). You're wrong about 311, make a noise complaint and they send the cops, that night, who will shut the crap down.

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  31. 311 does work. And if that doesn't work, also call the local precinct. No reason to be nice. There are noise ordinance laws and your neighbor is violating them.

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