Wednesday, August 19, 2026

'I smell dead things': The plot thins on Avenue A

The mucky tree well on Avenue A between Fifth Street and Sixth Street along the Con Ed substation is once again a bare plot of earth and pigeon feed.

The plants or crops — or whatever was managing to grow there — were removed by an unknown source last week, returning this particular patch of Avenue A to its more familiar state. 

Some readers may recall that the tree well enjoyed a brief horticultural renaissance in the spring of 2024, when a resident cleaned out the muck and added a collection of plants. 

However, it didn't last, as this tree well seems to be connected to an underground life force bubbling up from the earth's core. (Fact check, please.) 

The smell, however, remains. We once described it as "dead vampires" and were quickly called out for it: "Have you ever smelled a dead vampire?" 

Dammit. Anyway. 

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Isn't "dead vampires" an oxymoron?

Grieve said...

Busted again!

Anonymous said...

The flying rats love the stench 🥰

Anonymous said...

Dead Vampire the perfume/cologne for the Goth crowd.

Anonymous said...

Grieve have you been hitting that con ed kush

Anonymous said...

don't vampires go from undead to dead once they get staked?

Grieve said...

Been huffing the vapors from the stagnant pool of water ...

Anonymous said...

it was cleaned by Parks Dept

Anonymous said...

🖤

DrGecko said...

"Cleaned" seems like the wrong word, somehow. Modified? Reworked? Altered?

Anonymous said...

Ugh. Due to the soil quality issue this pit might do better with a more mature tree or a woody shrub that can take some abuse. Very challenging

Anonymous said...

Are we sure it was the Parks Dept? On the UES a preschool was growing corn in a tree bed and Sunday afternoon a mysterious man on a Citibike tore it all up (they have security cam footage from a nearby business). The Parks Dept told the press that they don't tear down tree bed plantings, in fact they encourage them.