As you probably know, the force of gravity has increased to move the Earth closer to the sun. Or is it the other way around?
No matter!
78 degrees?!
Should we be standing in line for something now? Water? Sunscreen? A sidewalk table at DBGB?
Previously on EV Grieve:
How can I really be expected to post today when the Storm of Feb. 8™ is on the way?
You are our slave.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to come off as a science nerd but actually, the orbit of the earth is taking the planet farther from the sun. The reason it's getting warmer is because the northern hemisphere is now pointing toward the sun, so the sun's rays have less atmosphere to penetrate.
ReplyDeleteOr maybe it's Lady Gaga.
Live all day: On Scene reports from all the local news stations asking riveting questions (e.g. “Hot enough for ya?” “This weather is CRAZY, right?”) to the people about the hotness!
ReplyDeleteI walked by Trader Joe's this morning.
ReplyDeleteNo line.
YET.
Wait till the panic sets in when the mercury hits 75!
Should we start preparing for next fall's hurricane now?
ReplyDeleteHow come no one told me that the "WRATH OF HELIOS" heatwave was striking today. I would have gone out and bought some milk and water.
ReplyDelete@ randall
ReplyDeleteI should have posted this YESTERDAY to give anyone who read it a chance to prepare. Now. Too late.
Actually, I'm thrilled that someone else saw the same fucked-up banner on the weather channel website. I was looking at the forecast last night with my kid (11) and we saw that stupid banner and thought "What the 'ell?!", clicked on it and it was a goddamn snowstorm in the Rockies! Who cares here about the weather in Caspar or Denver? Of course they can have a snowstorm in April! So can Minnesota. And they really don't care if we're having a crazy heatwave. I wonder if they got some banner about 78 degrees in NYC.
ReplyDeleteI miss when we had that season called "spring". It was a nice transition between cold winter and hot summer. It was a simpler time.
ReplyDelete78 degrees? Easy to post- just take off your pants! I'm steps ahead you.
ReplyDeleteUse a thermometer..much more Accurate and local.
ReplyDeleteYou know things are bad when the Santa Ana winds blow through NYC.
ReplyDelete...and my damn heat finally came on.
Weather is like this every single day in LA plus there aren't banks opening in every freshly available storefront.
ReplyDeleteWrath of Helios! Hahahahaha!
ReplyDelete@ Anon 3:40
ReplyDeleteHoly Crap! you mean to say that in LA you deal with trauma inducing heat EVERYDAY! What do they call that weather affliction? How do you guys survive out there? Maybe you can share some of your heatwave survival tips and stories with our local NYC news media so that they can better prepare us for "WRATH OF HELIOS!!!!!!!!!" type weather conditions.