We're all likely stuck with a SATC sequel, so we might as well make fun of it (some more)

Over at Runnin' Scared today, Roy Edroso has some fun whipping up plotlines that we'd like to see for the as-yet-to-be-written Sex and the the City sequel...news of which was recently confirmed. (Haven't we suffered enough of late with all the lousy economic news...?) Per Runnin' Scared:

Big's salary is capped at $500,000, and Carrie is replaced at the paper by a 19-year-old anal sex enthusiast with the nom de plume BrownEye, in honor of the Ivy League school she dropped out of. Money becomes tight, and Big finds that after a lifetime of Cohibas he cannot adjust to El Productos. After a series of comic moonlighting misadventures as a cab driver and new media consultant, he works contacts from his secret past as a NYPD detective and gets some shifts as a bouncer with his old pal Jesse L. Martin. Carrie starts a blog, which she makes racier to draw traffic ("How can I say I love you," her words scrolls across the MacBook screen, "when your balls are in my mouth?") but it still doesn't pay much, and they are forced to move to Greenpoint. There is a poignant, slow-motion moment when Carrie realizes Vera Wang isn't suitable for Studio B.