Too pissed for punctuation

Photo by Stacie Joy 

Moving time in the EV (and elsewhere). 

Leave my packages alone 

and thanks to whoever took my

packing tape for my move its 

fucked up

From the Heads Up Dept.: In case you are thinking of trespassing at 325 E. Houston St.

Photos by Stacie Joy

Just FYI — "Thieves will be beaten."
 

Tuesday's parting urban etiquette note

Photos by Stacie Joy 

As seen on 10th Street between Avenue C and Avenue D... 

Please have your alarm checked. It is going off and disturbing the community!

Noted

An urban etiquette note as seen on Third Street between Avenue A and Avenue B... 

Stop shitting in our garden. 

We are tired of picking up your shit. 

Stop being a criminal. 

Anyway, enjoy your Easter holiday weekend (if you celebrate)! 

Thanks to Mark White for the photo!

Today in urban etiquette notes on 7th Street about dogs shitting in tree planters

An urban etiquette note from Seventh Street. (Thank you, East Village Neighbor, for the photo!) 

And the message, with an attention-grabbing salutation: 

Dear Neighbor Who Let His Dog Shit in Our Tree Planter, 

You waited until no one was looking, but we saw you and took a photo — busted! The EV has a website for people who rudely don't clean up after their dogs, congrats! You're on it. Have some courtesy for others. 

P.S. Invest in some poop bags.

P.S.

East Village Neighbor asks, Is there actually a dog poop non-picker-upper website in the EV???

A Thanksgiving Day message to stop throwing eggs on 9th Street

Photo by William Klayer 

Spotted on Ninth Street and First Avenue... 

Happy Thanksgiving

Are you throwing eggs at the people in the encampment, or do you know who is? Please ask them to stop. 

Likewise, whoever has been throwing eggs at buildings 400, 402, 404, 406... please stop.

Season's greetings!

A reader shares that note from an undisclosed East Village apartment building...

To whoever stole every package delivered yesterday — I hope you enjoy Hell. :)

Noted

A reader shared this warning sign posted on a building along St. Mark's Place... 

You fucking thief! I am watching, and when I catch you, I will kill you!

Noted

The urban etiquette notes are striking a kinder tone around here — "please be courteous and refrain from urinating here" as seen on Essex just below Houston (thanks for the photo Stacie Joy!) ... and the other day we had the "please do not defecate here" one.

Noted

Dave on 7th spotted this straightforward urban etiquette note on Seventh Street: "Please do not defecate here!"

Notes for Apt. #2

An EVG reader shared this photo of two notes from the lobby of an undisclosed East Village building... both missives are directed to the resident(s) of Apt. #2 about the use of the fire escape.

 Note No. 1:

Hey, Apt. #2. A fire escape is not a terrace. I understand you need to smoke outside. Really. But listening to your experience of body issues and freshman year in Italy dealing with pasta is really dull. People in this building work early in the morning. S.T.F.U. Thank you. ❤️

The note writer in the second missive is now more agitated.

Day after day. Hearing your difficulites with life when you are spoiled brats is awful. Stop making hard working people listen to your crap. Move back with your jefk off Boomer parents in NJ, CT or LI. TY

Noted

Dave on 7th shares this urban etiquette note from 7th Street... 

It's not right to leave your dog poop in the backyard for Raymond to clean up. Please develop better manners.

How package thefts helped unify this East Village building

The above photo is from the EVG archives and isn't related to this story in the Times. 

Over at The New York Times today, Julie Besonen writes about the East Village building that she has lived in since the 1990s... touching on some relatable themes — changing demographics and package thefts. 

Some excerpts:

Package theft wasn’t an issue when I first moved in during the Grunge years, although crack vials routinely littered our stoop. Sleepy addicts sometimes blocked the door. But these entryway inconveniences were minor compared with the constant robberies, which rapidly escalated last year.

And...

But back to 30 years ago: Aside from the stoop problem, our building was a neighborly haven, owned by the same family for generations and monitored by live-in supers, a couple from Malta named Agnes and Tony. Our ensemble of residents (Bill, Bob, John, Pat, Tom) worked unflashy jobs — mailroom clerk, museum guide and so on — and stayed for decades, giving me the chance to grow fond of them, including nuisances like Edith and Victor (secretary, janitor), who banged on my ceiling when my music blared. It only took them 14 years to trust me enough to water their plants when they traveled. 

The poignant exodus of these characters, through death, eviction, buyouts and, most recently, the pandemic, made way for my current neighbors, variously named Summer, Kennedy, Madison, Kayleigh, Mackenzie, Hannah and Charity. They pay rents that seem exorbitant, upward of $4,000 in some cases, reflecting the East Village’s own hypergentrification.

However, as Besonen writes, the spate of pandemic-era package thefts helped her forge a bond with her new, younger neighbors.

Ralitsa Kalfas, 23 ... found an empty cardboard box instead of winter coats and sweaters sent to her from her family. A vintage jacket that once belonged to her grandmother was stolen too. My empathy for these young women grew, realizing they weren’t that different from me when I first moved to New York, my shyness sometimes interpreted as unfriendliness.

You can read the full piece here.

Noted

An EVG reader shares this Urban Etiquette Sign from a building on Ninth Street... which asks the occupant to please be considerate of other tenants (tennants!)... Why?

All of us can hear everything that happens in your apartment... 

Yes.... 

Everything ..... 

      (Literally ... everything)

Noted

And from the Notes in the Lobby: After Hours Edition... this note in an East Village lobby is a little NSFW, so...

To the thieves in this building.

I will find out who you are.

Where I come from BITCH

we cut your fucking hands off

and mail it to your family.

You like stealing from hardworking people, huh?

The one who took less than 20 mins to take

my package, I hope you enjoy wearing my underwear.

[Etc. Etc. Etc.]

I WILL FIND YOU Degenerate.

I curse your hands and your blood line.

Thanks to Mark White for the photo! I think!

Calling out a plant thief on 7th Street

Someone is understandably upset about the plant theft in this tree well on Seventh Street between First Avenue and Second Avenue... EVG reader Robert Miner shares photos of the messages left at the scene...

"Cutting out my plants. You are worse than rats. You are very sick person." (Above!)

And: "Cutting my plants. Breaking my grill. You're a sick person. You need to see a doctor."

A warning for 'selfish joggers' on 1st Avenue

Another COVID-19 Urban Etiquette Sign... this one on First Avenue between First Street and Second Street...



The sign's author writes:

Selfish joggers

who jog on this

block without

masks be warned —

We value the

lives of our

elderly

neighbors and

will throw stuff

on you from our

windows!!!

Noted

A COVID-19 Urban Etiquette Sign spotted on the Bowery at Fourth Street.

It reads:

Dear Jogger,

Bicycle Douchebag,

Yuppie/Millennial,

Narcissist swine:

PUT ON A FUCKING MASK.

Please respect your community and the lives of others.

YOU DO NOT LIVE ALONE.

Love,

East Village

Thanks to EVG reader Tina Li for the photo! Also spotted the signs on Second Avenue.

Meanwhile, on 3rd Street

From Third Street, a very pointed COVID-19 Urban Etiquette Sign ...

To the asshole
who keeps leaving
dirty gloves outside
my window

Suck my whole dick!

Thanks to Mark White for the photo!

Coronavirus Urban Etiquette Sign of the day

Spotted on Ninth Street between Avenue A and First Avenue by William Klayer.

Signs telling people not to discard their disposable gloves (or masks) are needed. EVG correspondent Steven spotted these late yesterday afternoon on one block — the west side of First Avenue between Sixth Street and Seventh Street...