
Out with the Scofflaw Patrol ... Making a stop on Avenue B and East Fifth Street last night...

Photos via Robert Miner.
The suspect ... asked for the victim's wallet and cellphone so he could write a ticket for public intoxication, cops said.
He told them he would be right back, but never returned, police said.
Name: Christopher Tanner
Occupation: Artist, Playwright, Actor
Location: La MaMa Experimental Theatre Club, 4th between 2nd and Bowery
Time: 3:30 on Monday, Sept 16
I’ve lived here for 33 or so years. I came here in ‘79. I’m from California, from a little horrible place called Duarte. A hideous place. You know, I didn’t fit in. I’m just like every other New Yorker who moved to get away.
I moved to 30 East 3rd Street, right next to the men’s shelter and lived there for 20 years. And then I’ve been on 11th between A and B for 13 years. Since my place on 3rd Street was next to the men’s shelter, you’d hear things like, ‘Oh Jesus Christ, you just stomped on my face!’ Or you’d walk over dead bodies. One time I was going to my apartment and in between the doors were two naked black lesbians having sex and both were pregnant, and smoking crack.
I moved to the neighborhood because I worked at a couple theaters in the neighborhood and I was also being shown in a gallery here. I’m an artist, a painter and a sculptor, and an actor.
A lot of my work is all big huge sequin paintings, 10 feet tall. They’re 3 dimensional and they have human hair embroideries, glitter, found objects, crystal encrusted stuff, and beautiful things. I’m sort of a magpie. But what I’m doing at my studio are these Japanese silver leaf paintings. The silver is all made with pigments of color, so it’s bright pink silver or bright orange. It’s just beautiful. You can’t imagine that it’s silver, but it has that luminous quality that silver has.
I lost my art studio on 10th Street between B and C in Hurricane Sandy. It all turned out okay because I got grants, but it was a huge cleanout of my art supplies and my life. I’m a collage artist so I collected a lot of stuff. It was pretty heavy to be lost. The worst part was throwing away all the art and all my dead lover's books and his poetry. That was hard. But then I got a better studio, an incredible studio at La MaMa. It all worked out.
I did my first play here at La MaMa in ’79. I was doing other people’s plays at first and I started creating my own around ’85. I’ve done so many plays here. La MaMa is my home for theater. Cyndi Lauper once came over to one of my musicals, "Under the Kerosene Moon," based on The Honeymoon Killers, and she asked me to get all of my friends together and do a drag version of "Girls Just Want To Have Fun." And we all met at my house in drag and had a big fabulous party, right next to the men’s shelter, and all the bums were waving at us.
I just did my last show, which was stories from my life with songs called "Football Head: Tales of Shame and Humiliation." That’s going to be shown in June at La MaMa, but my last play was huge. It was called "The Etiquette of Death." That was also in the Ellen Stewart Theatre at La MaMa, last season. It was a big collage of 20 actors, 10 writers, five composers, and a 10-piece band.
I asked all these different writers to write a scene on their take on etiquette of death, whatever it may be. I made this whole collage out of that, but it was also based upon my aunt who was a big Avon lady. Her name was Joan Gurtler. She was a huge boss and used to fire Avon ladies on the phone. She was fabulous. And so it’s her sort of giving death a makeover. Death was played by Everett Quinton, who’s a great star. It’s all about my aunt the makeup lady, played by me, giving death a makeover, so he’ll be easy on her son, because her son is dying of AIDS, but also Joan’s dying of brain tumors. It’s a comedy.
The four-part plan will enlarge and revamp the plazas around the Alamo and the uptown 6 subway stop, as well as widen the sidewalks near Cooper Square and freshen up Cooper Park. The biggest change will ease the jumbled intersection of Cooper Square, Fourth Avenue, the Bowery, and 5th Street with creation of the 8,000-square-foot Village Plaza. Every section will see new trees and more plantings, new seating, and new lighting, and construction will last for two years.
"Dear Friends,
Don't let your douchebag NYU friends sit on the stoop all day long..."
Goats (Goat Brothers Inc), 213 2nd Ave at 13th St (op)
VOTE: Understanding that this is a sale of assets of a preexisting tavern, Community Board 3 moves to deny the application for a full on-premise liquor license for Atlas Hugged Inc., with a proposed business name of Goats, for the premise located at 213 Second Avenue, at 13th Street, unless the applicant agrees before the SLA to make as conditions of its license the following signed notarized stipulation that
1) it will operate as a tavern with food service,
2) it will have a closed fixed façade with no open doors or windows,
3) it will play recorded music, and not have live music, DJs, promoted events, scheduled performances or any
event at which a cover fee will be charged,
4) it will not have "happy hours," and
5) it will not host pub crawls or party buses.
Amy is requesting that anyone who may have seen Jewels between the evening of Friday, September 13 after 9 pm and the early morning hours of Saturday, September 13 contact her to tell her: when and where they saw him, what they observed, and what, if anything transpired between them and Jewels.
Amy, Jewels' former wife, would also like to know of any witnesses to beatings Jewels experienced in the week and in the days prior to his death. She is asking that anyone with any information or details (nothing is too insignificant) contact her via email.
St. Mark's Bookshop is presently immersed in this change. We seek to relocate to a new space and while we're at it, reinvigorate the shop's identity. Our vision includes the kind of curated, progressive selection of titles in literature, poetry, politics, critical theory, small press publications and hard-to-find journals and magazines our customers have come to expect to find on our shelves.
We also envision a hybrid organization that would present nonprofit arts programming, including a comprehensive roster of author events, lectures and literary gatherings housed by a community-supported bookstore, a physical brick-and-mortar space where people meet, discuss ideas, browse, discover and enjoy non-electronic books and publications and listen to great writers present their work.
We're passionate about this future and hope you will help us get there. Here's how you can get involved in launching the new St. Mark's Bookshop.
VOLUNTEER:
We need individuals
• people with expertise in marketing and in the following sub-specialties: social media, public relations and communication campaign strategy. Two to eight hours per month, September-December.
• educators/academics, readers and writers to be our advocates. Get on our growing mailing list, follow us on Twitter and Facebook and share news about St. Mark's Bookshop with your personal and professional networks. Help to get out the word about upcoming events and key dates announced in our newsletter, September 2013 forward.
• community networkers — who do you know? Help St. Mark's Bookshop connect with advocates throughout the city, the rest of the country and across the globe. September 2013 on.
Look for updates in mid September and throughout the rest of 2013. We will announce our new location soon!
And please drop by the bookshop. We remain committed to the East Village community and local writers.
There's an advance screening and Q&A with with writer/director Stuart Zicherman for "A.C.O.D." (stands for Adult Children of Divorce) on Wednesday, Sept. 18 at 9 p.m. at the UCB East Theater on East Third Street. The new comedy stars Adam Scott, Jane Lynch, Amy Poehler, Catherine O'Hara, Jessica Alba, Clark Duke, among others.
Tickets can be purchased here for $5