I was hoping they'd leave up the newspaper with the Megan Fox feature.

Previously on EV Grieve:
Avenue B to get a little Panache
Take residential buildings where tenants have no in-house washer and dryer. Residents must schlep laundry to the basement washroom or nearest Laundromat. I understand they don't wish to be dirty neighbors but can't they cover their menfolks' unwashed BVDs? Tuck their own bra straps inside the basket? Under the box of Ivory? Those who are big-busted or cosmetically enhanced could invest in Ivory's economy-size box.
Food delivery is another thing. The pizza guy coming up. The Chinese-food delivery boy. Always nice to have the aroma of subgum wafting to the roof. And can we talk about the sweaty bicycle rider who gets in with his helmet, leg clamps, wheel chain -- and does NOT look like Lance Armstrong?
In buildings minus a service elevator, one must occasionally cool one's designer heels as deliverymen load cartons of toilet paper, Pampers and oranges that always roll out of their brown-paper bags into the lift. Everyone stares into the bags thinking, "Hmmm, chuck steak instead of T-bone. Apartment 46K's having money trouble."
In truth this get-up was pretty much the unvarying male uniform last summer also, but this year an unexpected element has been added to the look, and that is a burgeoning potbelly one might term the Ralph Kramden..
Too pronounced to be blamed on the slouchy cut of a T-shirt, too modest in size to be termed a proper beer gut, developed too young to come under the heading of a paunch, the Ralph Kramden is everywhere to be seen lately, or at least it is in the vicinity of the Brooklyn Flea in Fort Greene, the McCarren Park Greenmarket and pretty much any place one is apt to encounter fans of Grizzly Bear.
What the trucker cap and wallet chain were to hipsters of a moment ago, the Kramden is to what my colleague Mike Albo refers to as the “coolios” of now. Leading with a belly is a male privilege of long standing, of course, a symbol of prosperity in most cultures and of freedom from anxieties about body image that have plagued women since Eve
Cinema Nolita is one of the last of a dying breed: a video store that not only still stocks plenty of VHS tapes (much to the delight of my 13-year-old daughter, who has a huge case of technological nostalgia) but has a large and varied DVD collection that leans toward classics and foreign while still covering all the requisite new release bases. Perhaps even more importantly, it's the kind of store where knowledgable employees remember your name and call up your membership before you get to the counter, and where they remember your rental history and taste and may even warn you away from a turkey...
The Lieutenant: [to Jesus Christ] Mutt! You got something that you want to say to me? You fuck! You ratfuck, you ratfuck! Here's your... What? Say something, I know you're just standing there. What am I gonna do? You gotta say something! Something! You fuck, you fucking stand there and you want me to do every fucking thing! Where were you? Where the fuck are you? Where were you? Where the hell were you? I... I... I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! I'm sorry! I did so many bad things. I'm sorry. I tried to do... I try to do the right thing, but I'm weak, I'm too fucking weak. I need you to help me! Help me! I need you to help me! Forgive me! Forgive me! Forgive me, please! Forgive me, father!