This Little Piggy called his cardiologist in advance

There's a rather hilarious review of the new This Little Piggy Had Roast Beef shop on First Avenue near Ninth Street over at The Awl. Here's part of the exchange between Balk and Choire:

BALK: I am a man who LIKES HIS SALT. And I've got to say?
BALK: That roast beef was SALTY. Like, if I'm ever going to have that heart attack I've been working up to, it's gonna be today.
Choire: Yes. I actually don't… I don't feel right?
BALK: Are you getting the tingling thing down the arm?
Choire: No! Though I did have that the other night? I mean, I feel bad, not in the way, like, OMG BAD MEAT? But like, "Oh I have a cup of salt inside me that I cannot dilute even with this 33.8 ounce container of seltzer!"
Choire: The sneaky thing is: we didn't realize this WHILE we were eating!
Choire: Which is what makes the sandwich magical.
BALK: I know, it just tasted great!
BALK: And then… jdkvngekjrgvbsvbjjvk.
BALK: So I guess we should tell the roast beef fans of New York that they will enjoy this sandwich, but they should call their cardiologist in advance?

Day of Ray lineup set

We'll have more later this week on the Day of Ray, coming this Saturday from noon to 6 p.m. at Sidewalk on Avenue A and Sixth Street...check out the flyer designed by Jennifer Schindelar....



And here's the lineup...

NOON - Luigi Babe

12:15 - Reww

12:25 - Marilyn Kirby

12:40 - 5 minute video by Pam Kray

12:50 - Bowery Boys (Joff solo set)

1:05 - (comedian) Andrew Lisa

1:15 - Shaker Pegs

1:35 - Elastic No-No Band (Justin solo set)

1:50 - (comedian) Steve Bossous

2:00 - Mike Winkler

2:15 - A Brief View of the Hudson

2:30 - Jordan Levinson

2:50 - East River String Band

3:10 - Bill Murray Experience

3:30 - (comedian) Johnny Lanzilloto

3:40 - Nobody Can Dance

4:00 - Joe Yoga

4:15 - Master Lee

4:35 - The Fools

4:50 - Daniella, Our Lady of Perpetual PMS

5:00 - Jessica Delfino

5:15 - Toby Goodshank

And, you know, there's a Save Ray's Twitter feed, which will have the latest updates...

www.twitter.com/saverays

And there's the Save Ray's Facebook page...

And thanks to Lilly, Haley, Leah, the folks at Sidewalk and everyone else responsible for helping put this benefit together...

Live at the "top of the Bowery"

There's a new listing for a studio apartment on Cooper Square... $530,000 and it can be all yours...



Perhaps it's a fine home... I just didn't make it past the first sentence of the listing:

Top Of The Bowery -- Bright, Renovated Studio Condo Located On The Edge Of Noho And The East Village And Just Above The Evolving And Now Chic Bowery.

Former Joe Jr's space looking empty and lonely ... and suspiciously like a future nail salon

Walked by the former home of Joe Jr's at Sixth Avenue and 12th Street for the first time in months ... The "for rent" sign is still up, and the space is all cleaned out, and looking like it's prepped for a bland doctor's office or, more likely, a nail salon...






Previously on EV Grieve:
Joe Jr's has closed

Chico has a new work in progress on Houston and Avenue B

A tipster riding the M9 yesterday afternoon noted that Chico and company were at work on the corner of Houston and Avenue B... and here's the mural so far...




Not sure just yet what this is going to be a mural for...

This replaces the anti-violence mural that Chico and and the POP (Power of Peace) Youth Anti-Violence Coalition created last October.

Meanwhile, right around the corner...

...After checking out Chico's mural, I saw that the shabby liquor store on Houston and B that I like so much wasn't open last night...



I haven't been here in some time... I forget the woman's name who runs the place. I enjoy watching her reaction to some fancypants asking her if they have any, say, really buttery California chardonnays whose grapes were harvested on hillsides composed of Kimmeridgian marl, limestone and chalk. Her reaction is usually either, "WHAT?" or "WHY WOULD WE HAVE THAT."

Figure this is one of those doomed corners...so I'll often take a photo of the storefront. Come to think of it, I took these shots on a Friday afternoon in the fall, and they weren't open then either...

An endorsement that the Horus Cafe management (and neighbors) will just love

Horus Cafe, everybody's worst nightmare favorite hookah hotspot on Avenue B and Sixth Street, received a nice writeup in Washington Square News, NYU's student newspaper...



The premise of the article: "So for those under 21, here are some fun options for your weekend entertainment that you might not have considered before." To the endorsement of Horus!

Horus Cafe is usually crowded and poorly ventilated, resulting in thick smoke hanging from the ceiling at all hours. But its East Village location is definitely convenient, as evidenced by the swarms of underclassmen who frequent the hookah joint on East Sixth Street and Avenue A on the weekends. DJs spin Top-40 songs and belly dancers drift about Thursday through Saturday nights, adding spice to an otherwise mellow night out. Sample the Middle Eastern menu while you're at it, and you won't be disappointed.

Swarms of underclassman...poor ventilation...smoke hanging from the ceiling... why not just call the DOH too?

East Village Visitors Center moves to East Fourth Street

Per the news release:

Lower East Side History Project has joined forces with Fourth Arts Block and the Cooper Square Committee to bring the East Village Visitors Center to the heart of the E.4th Street Cultural District.

The new EVVC is open Tuesday through Saturday, 11 a.m. to 6 p.m.

Let's get lost (soberly)

We've heard from readers about those strange numbers on the gate at Professor Thom's on Second Avenue between 13th Street and 14th Street ....



This means nothing to me... A reader explained that this is from "Lost," which begins its finale tonight... and Thom's has a "Lost" viewing party.... I went to the site to link.... and I noticed this:




"Unfortunately, we will not be able to sell alcohol at the event due to Community Board relations but the party will still go on and the food and soda will be flowing."

EV Grieve Etc: Mourning Edition

Ray pays his January rent today (Neither More Nor Less)

Old Hell's Kitchen butcher becomes a — oh yeah! — Subway (Grub Street)

The roll-down gates of the East Village (Jeremiah's Vanishing NY)

More debate on Avenue D's luxury housing (The Lo-Down)

Remembering J.D. Salinger with a retro white T-shirt (Nonetheless)

Signs of life at new LES tiki bar (Eater)

One to do with those leftover shrimp heads (With Leftovers)

Selling 195 Bowery (BoweryBoogie)

More scary shit about ATM skimmers (BoingBoing)

Stromboli on First Avenue at St. Mark's Place has reopened following the addition...

Barfin' at the Coop: The Serial Vomiter strikes again

We're hesitant to write anymore about this ongoing atrocity versus architecture... However, it is our duty to file this report... As we worldwide exclusively reported last Friday, someone in recent weeks has turned the new Cooper Union academic building into his or her own private vomitorium... We hoped that these were merely isolated incidents, perhaps... perhaps just an extra vicious pub crawl, extended game of flip cup or soapy batch of McSorley's...

No. The Vomitrator is getting dangerous, empowered by the publicity we so willingly heaped upon this sick individual.

As seen Sunday morning...



And, for any of you skeptics who thinks that the Yeti is a myth or believes that balding comes from your mom’s side (or wearing hats), here is further evidence that someone (or thing) is chundering on the Coop... the outline of previous puking sessions as seen here in Exhibits A through E:







We're curious what will happen next. Will the Cooper Union beef up security, particularly after happy hour? Or will The Vomitrator be free to strike again? Given the number of bars/tourists/students in this region, can anything stop The Vomitrator?

The Telephone Bar hangs it up

As I first reported on Jan. 13, The Telephone Bar & Grill on Second Avenue near Ninth Street, an EV mainstay the last 22 years, was closing at the end of the month... there was an "end of the era" farewell Sunday night for regulars...and today, the bar was papered over...awaiting its new tenant, something from the owner of Down The Hatch, among others...

My post on Jan. 13 solicted several reader comments...an outpouring that took me by surprise...

Previously on EV Grieve:
The Telephone Bar and Grill closing after 22 years

What's coming to The Telephone Bar space? Some fratty debauchery, perhaps

Price cutting atop Kiehl's

In early December, we wrote about 203 E. 13th St. #PH4B, the rooftop pad on Third Avenue above Kiehl's...it's a fine looking home that was going for $1.265 million.




Well, thank God that you didn't buy it then.

Why?

Last Thursday, the owners slashed the price by $200,000 (16 percent) to $1,065,000. With that money you just saved, you can buy some shampoo at Kiehl's.

The official listing is here. Streeteasy has some history.

Previously on EV Grieve:
Speaking of rooftops: 'Own a piece of history in this boutique condo Penthouse of the historic Kiehl's Building'

Alexander Wang launches ad campaign for his new anti-itch powder

On 12th Street at Third Avenue.

Oh! It's his T line. Per BlackBook:

[H]e's making quite a statement with his first-ever ad campaign for his lower-priced line T. "The energy was much more appropriate for something like guerrilla marketing than anything too proper or formal," Wang says of the ads which will only grace NYC sidewalks, not the pages of the magazines currently stocked at your local newsstand.