Daily Candy checks in today with their take on the new Cooper Square Hotel (aka, "Dildo of Darkness"):
The Cooper Square Hotel Opens
You can hate your neighbors only until you realize you love them.
So it was with The Cooper Square Hotel, which infuriated the testy East Village. Then came the post-construction reveal: Damn, this is one fine-looking, well-mannered new kid on the block.
An intriguing, modern glass tower, The Cooper has enough outdoor garden space to make you think the 6 train added a stop in L.A. The beautiful library off the lobby has a fireplace, bookshelves filled with eclectic volumes from Housing Works, and an honor bar for everyone. (Yes, even off-the-street riffraff like us.) Govind Armstrong’s long-awaited Table 8 outpost will open in February.
Overnight guests (yippee, no more fleabag St. Mark’s hotels!) won’t want to leave, what with the indie movies in the minibar, Red Flower amenities, three bathrobes, and insane city views.
It’s enough to inspire a block party.
Don't you want to be inspired for a block party?
Wait, is that an advertorial? Or is Daily Candy claiming that this copy represents their love of that monstrosity. In any case, this excerpt is a perfect metaphor for the hotel: vile to behold, badly crafted and borne of cynical intent.
And as for: "yippee, no more fleabag St. Mark’s hotels!"
Fuck you, go home. God your incessant updates are annoying.
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