Friday, May 13, 2011

'Soon the entire length of Avenue B will be lined with shit holes like this'

And in case you didn't see this yet at the Voice... Robert Sietsema checks in with an epic rant on the state of Avenue B dining and nightlife these days ... starring Billy Hurriance's.


To the post!

You look up at the street sign and realize you're in the hippest nabe in the world, the old E.V. And it dawns on you that soon the entire length of Avenue B will be lined with shit holes like this, crass dining and drinking establishments that might have been invented by Guy Fieri. Yes, now we're in the Fieri-verse, a realm of ostentatiousness overconsumption so abject, that nori rolls may come wrapped in bacon so as not to frighten the regulars with seaweed. Any self-respecting blogger would turn and run from such an apparition, yet this appears to be the future of the streets where Allen Ginsberg and Charlie Parker once strolled.

It had to be said.

Photo via

21 comments:

Marty Wombacher said...

Wow! Love that excerpt! I have nothing more to add, it says it all!

Lisa said...

From a Yelp review:

"It's best to come here when already intoxicated or to at the very least, get intoxicated quickly after walking through the door."

Yeah, welcome to the new East Village, home of soulless, bland, cheesy venues in which the juvenile clientele need to be hammered to even stand being in 'em.

S said...

It's a damn shame there's a nice bar underneath Billy Hurricane's. I went there once for an industry event and they have amazing decor, fantastic whiskey selection, nice bartenders, etc. Then the "regular crowd" came in after 9 and you couldn't have paid me to stay - which is sad, it's a great little bar and I live next door. I like change, I like new bars, I like everything, but I hate Billy Hurricane's - it's nothing more than a pit-stop on a mission to vomit on a sidewalk.

Anonymous said...

Ave B has always been a shithole, now it's just a different kind of shithole.

AC said...

This place makes the 13th Step seem like the Café Carlyle.

Anonymous said...

I always thought shithole was 1 word?

Shawn said...

It is perfect, right Marty?

Marty Wombacher said...

Agreed, Shawn! Let me know when you go to get that bagel! I don't think I know anyone that's never had one and I'm amazed by it. (Yes, I'm easily amazed!)

OWR said...

It's nouveau Shithole but the old Shithole was even worse. Twenty years ago no person could safely walk down Ave B withoug worrying about getting jumped or fucked over. I had to do that the first 15 years of my life. At least now the cops will go down there if only to protect the annoying children that are hanging there now.

Anonymous said...

"Our kitchen is rockin". I hope you fucking die, and burn in hell along with the hot chicks sign.

the other Lisa said...

"It's nouveau Shithole but the old Shithole was even worse."

That's for sure, OWR. It seems disingenuous to object to Billy Hurricane's on the grounds that it's making the neighborhood less safe, or adding a new element of drunken rowdiness to these once pristine streets.

No, the real gripe is that this place is simply too too middlebrow.

East Villagers can endure ANY discomfort but that.

East Village Eats said...

Idle Hands Bar underneath is an awesome place as S mentioned earlier. It's just too bad that the brightly lit clusterfuck of a bar that is Billy Hurricane's is in the same address & people often think that they're affiliated.

FreeRide said...

This place is the main turd in the crown of lame that the E.V. is slowly being turned into on Thursday/Friday/Saturday Nights.

The second plague on the E.V.? "Brunch" The word sends shivers down my spine!

I'm not saying that I want the EV to return to it's disturbing drug addled craziness of the 70s and 80s, but seriously.... can't we curb the over saturation of bars (especially those aimed at bringing the casting rejects from the Jersey Shore to our neighborhood), and make the Sex and the city set return to it's bottle service in the MeatPacking?

I mean this IS an actual neighborhood. I actually attempt to live a life here.

Anonymous said...

And this is why I've left the city. Fucking vomiting yunnies and Mike Bloomberg. Good riddance.

I survived Fun City, so fuck you.

Anonymous said...

Very upset and dismayed by this place. I saw it just yesterday and my stomach turned. Hopefully it will die.

Billy said...

All the complaining about all the changes downtown is getting real old... Don't get it confused though, I love NYC history, and complained myself and sorrowed over losing alot of downtown staples...

Everyone cherish's their neighborhoods for how they were involved with it and their memories. The changing is nothing new and as everyone is getting older, their routines just probably feel interupted.

I just don't understand why for those who complain, why haven't you accepted the change is a never-ending process and will eventually surpass the years you spent enjoying your time in your neighborhood. How many years have I heard someone say "OMG ANOTHER STARBUCKS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD" and yet they keep coming and coming... If you lived in a neigborhood 20 years, and complained for 10 years abotu starbucks popping up, you know they are still gonna keep popping up for another 10 years, that 20 years of complaining in misery. Why don't you put that time to actually enjoying your city or a new place.

Example: I personally am not a fan of hipsters or whatever you wanna call it... Instead of blogging about every little bit of change,,, "OMG ANOTHER HIPSTER IS DRINKING AN ICE COFFEE ON BEDFORD".... I simply just don't go there anymore, and it hasn't bothered me in a very long time... I only surround myself in enviornments and bring people around me that contribute positive reactions.

My point i'm tired of the complaining, and just accept NYC isn't what it used to be and we should just share what we enjoy about it... There's new generations of youth growing up everyday and soon all the whole foods, starbucks etc will be part of their memories growing up, hopefully good memories.

At the end of the day most of the time we are are just hypocrites anyway and eventualyl become customers to the establishments they feel are invading their neighborhood.

Billy said...

The owner of Billy Hurricanes is in his late 20's, early 30's. How about giving him a pat on his back for taking on a buisness venture. That's how I see it. I admit the bar deffinatly doesn't hold the feel of typical downtown bar or even New York bar outside of Times Sqaure... The food is pretty good, and the owner is not a complete stranger to locals. Meaning he's a part of the community and is doing good. Hey, if you got a business that's making money, do what you gotta do.

Post a reply of what you would like to see on Ave B.. to your desire and i'll suggest a small town out in Long Island or out of state that can accomidate to your likings. Downtown isn't what it used to be, I don't like the change either, but GUESS WHAT... I don't live downtown anymore... problem solved... I enjoy life too much to complain.

I know the old timers like to get into the whole raising a family thing and generations of their family on Ave B... I know alot of them also... yes, it's sad the challanges they are faced with... but that's where we ended up...

I was out there with the mosaic man camping out of his place on st. marks when they evicted him... at the end of the day he found a new place. was the protesting worth it? i dunno ask him, i'd rather move on and find new things to enjoy joy, some battles can't be won.

Anonymous said...

complemented by croxley's, right across the street, where the pungent odor of 25 cent buffalo wings and cheap beer engulf passers by . . . it is the blanding of the east village, where not an original idea is left in the heads of those 20 (or 30) somethings, only the drive to make cash and make the area suck hard for residents and those with a bit of the arts/subculture left in their veins. i welcome entrepreneurs, especially filling empty storefronts. but sadly the renaissance in brooklyn can't happen here due to astronomical rents and landlords who lack any vision or interest in creating anything more unique than sports bar and badly done-over delis.

Leesy said...

You said it perfectly Admin!

Mark S. said...

I live in the EV.

I like Billy's. I like Ace Bar. I like Croxley's. I like Idle Hands. I like Poco. I like the Nuyorican. I like Zum Schneider. I detest Manitoba's, the Library, 7B (now), Plan B and more. Nothing special about an aging "dump" of a bar.

They actually do interact with the community, locals and such.

Avenue B has always been a shithole.

People have to relax, if you have a problem go sit at Manitoba's or some other bullshit place that is your "cool" spot.

It makes me laugh sometimes how close-minded people in the EV can be.

If you don't like the direction... move.

Anonymous said...

Charlie Parker was a drug addict.
He would have rolled thru Billy's...

Allen Ginsberg bitched about everything! He would not have.

Stupid post.
Stop complaining. It's not the 60's, 70's or 80's anymore.