Monday, February 1, 2010

Is America's greatest family moving to the East Village?

We're still reeling from the feature in yesterday's Post on the superduperfaboo Novogratz family...

After reading this, you may want to move to, say, Greenland. Or someplace where aren't TVs. And we pretty much have to excerpt the entire article:

Two gorgeous, self-taught downtown designers with seven young urban kids are set to become Manhattan's next reality-TV stars. Think "Jon & Kate Plus 8" meets "Sex and the City."

Artsy downtown couple Bob and Cortney Novogratz, who gut-renovate dilapidated city buildings and transform them into multimillion-dollar homes, are set to star in "9 by Design," a Bravo reality show premiering April 5 that chronicles their chaotic Manhattan life where real estate is the constant family drama.

Their shenanigans could make Bob and Cortney the latest New Yorkers you love to hate -- with some viewers likely to be outraged by the manic couple's constant uprooting of their kids, and others embracing them as the coolest and most photogenic TV parents since Mrs. Partridge and Billy Ray Cyrus.

Cameras follow the nomadic Novogratz clan -- they've moved more than 15 times within a five-mile radius -- as Bob and Cortney scramble to find a temporary apartment in one day after renting out their mansion at 5 Centre Market Place in SoHo.

They check out a $14,000-a-month East Village rental and briefly consider renting out an old bar where they would bathe their newborn in the urinal. They eventually settle on a two-bedroom apartment where all the kids have to share a 12 x 14 bedroom.

During the eight-episode season, Cortney gives birth, the couple builds their first boutique hotel on the Jersey Shore, and designs a private gym in Hoboken, NJ, a beach house in Amagansett and a townhouse in the East Village.

"We wanted to show off New York City like 'Sex and the City' did," said Bob, 46, who is filmed scooting around SoHo on his Vespa with his pregnant wife on the back of the bike.

"Building in the city is stressful," said Cortney, 38. "People can relate to moving whether they've moved once or as many times as we have. We've lost track of how many times we've moved over the past 17 years." Twice, the family has moved three times in one year.

The chronic flippers live in their homes while renovating, then sell them and move on to their next project.

The family currently lives in a five-bedroom, 8,000-square-foot townhouse at 400 West St., where they've built an indoor basketball court for the kids. But Bob and Cortney are already getting bored; they've listed the property for just under $20 million and are eyeing a move to the East Village.

"The kids may end up in therapy," Bob jokes on the show. Indeed, the couple actually named their fifth child "Five."

The Novogratz kids, Wolfgang, 12; twins Bellamy and Tallulah, 11; Breaker, 9; twins Five and Holleder, 4, and Major, 1, attend three different schools.

Meanwhile, as you may know, work continues at 238 E. Fourth St. between Avenue A and Avenue B where the former one-level construction company was razed to become a BoCoNo-designed $4 million penthouse.

Previously on EV Grieve:
A Manhattan family that intrigues, intimidates and nauseates

[Photo via]


Goggla said...

Does this mean there will be double-decker tour buses lined up outside Key Foods now?

If they're so bored, why not be adventurous and rent one of those new fab places on Ave D & Houston? That would make for some hilarious TV drama.

I'd tune in to see the baby getting bathed in a bar urinal.

EV Grieve said...

"Mom, Major is bathing in the urinal again...."

Anonymous said...

OMG. I think I feel dirty now. They named their fifth child Five? They want to bathe their child in a urinal? They've moved five or six times in a year? Why, in America, when children are in situations like this are the families rewarded? Oh, but they wanted to "brand themselves as a family." Just sick. I really hope they DON'T come to the neighborhood; we have enough problems just trying to keep it all together here, never mind the huge crews that would be needed to wipe the asses of this brood.

Jeremiah Moss said...

seems like, as long as it's on television, and it's stylish, it doesn't count as child exploitation. reminds me of Balloon Boy.

and it will be hard not to watch.

what have we become?

EV Grieve said...

Good point on Balloon Boy, Jeremiah.

Meanwhile, I'm hoping for some action figures from Bravo....

Anonymous said...

eew--maybe photo opp

Anonymous said...

i hope this faggot family dies who cares

Anonymous said...

They should film them when the middle kids become teens. I've met them around the city and the middle kids are already angry and sullen. The angnst of being rich and spoiled and on TV.

Working Class Schmuck said...

His brother is billionaire founder of Fortress Investment Group. It owns 2 real estate funds and a mortgage company. Coincidence?

Anonymous said...

What a bunch of sad people you all are. A couple who obviously love their children and provide a rich life in one of the most wonderful cities in the world... and you make those hateful comments. I pity you all.