Here's is a Craigslist ad for a pretty-average looking one-bedroom apartment. The headline describes the place as "sexy." Perhaps it is, though you wouldn't know it from the description:
New renovation
Perfect location near Whole Foods Trader [sic] and all transportation
Sun drenched with windows a [sic] plenty and Skylight
Queen sized Bedroom
Ample closets with Overhead stotage [sic]
Exposed Brick
And the unit is
H/T @SerenaSpeaks
21 comments:
The fake wood, click together like Legos floors are always sexy!
Maybe it is sexy because you can put your couch right across from the stove and cozy up while your tater tots are baking? Just a guess.
@ anon 8:18
Haha! Perfect! I can almost taste the crunch (of the tater tots)!
Sexy because I can come in through the skylight while you are asleep and like an alien have my way with you, or whatever shit katy perry sings about
"exposed" brick. Hubba Hubba! Hey girl. Sexy.
What makes this apartment sexy? That's a good question. Perhaps some modern Masters and Johnson-type research can figure out what special something this unit has that aroused the sexual interest of the ad writer.
Cause whoever moves in is getting screwed.
This is a bait and switch ad, no one is getting this place for that price, I would imagine this place is 2,600 or so.
Tiny Is More Like It.
The heat doesn't work, so you must have sex during the winter in order to remain alive.
IT IS CLEARLY SEXY WHY CAN'T YOU SEE IT?
Not sexy in the slightest. Sexy EV apartment = high ceilings, tin ceilings, original crown moldings, plaster rosettes around light fixtures, tub in the kitchen, original creaky wood plank floors, marble fireplace in the living room. Not to mention rent controlled!
Anyone who call anything other than a good looking woman or man 'sexy' is a pretentious bozo in my book. Cars, food, apartments, sexy ? No. Deborah Harry circa 1976 ? Yes.
Coming Soon to a block near you -- Sexy Biscuits served in a froyo hoof.
Of course I think you're sexy, apartment. This has never happened to me before. Maybe I'm just tired.
I'd totally tap that apt.
You know what ISN'T sexy? Someone who doesn't know how to spell and post a listing for an apartment correctly. Also the rent. Pathetic.
Pathetic is the new sexy.
My costume next Halloween? Sexy Apartment!
3-4 NYU students in a one bedroom. Sexy?
This apartment is too sexy for my cat.
Wait, my cat disagrees, and what he says goes (you don't mess with this cat), so "scratch" that.
- East Villager
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