Monday, March 11, 2019

The Annual Mr. Lower East Side Pageant returns to the neighborhood for its 20th edition

[Fun With Fritz in 2018 by Walter Wlodarczyk]

After several years in exile, the Mr. Lower East Side Pageant is coming back to the neighborhood for the 2019 edition, said to be the 20th annual*.

Reverend Jen, the longtime MC, is hosting again this year. She shared details about this year's event, happening March 23 at Bedlam, 40 Avenue C between Third Street and Fourth Street.

Per her media advisory:

It's time for the annual Mr. Lower East Side Pageant whereupon the women and gay men of New York and Parts Unknown choose one lucky man to rule the area South of Houston and East of the Bowery.

The 20th annual Pageant will prove to be an extra glamorous affair, much like the Ms. Universe Pageant, if all the contestants were hairy and liked Budweiser. To compete in this cutthroat Pageant, contestants need not live on the Lower East Side. (Because, no one can afford to anymore.) They simply must possess qualities, which would make them a proper representative of the neighborhood. (What those qualities are, we're not sure ...)

They also must prepare for the following three categories: 1.) One-Minute talent competition. 2.) Swimwear, and 3.) Evening Wear combined with Q&A. Contestants must show up no later than 8 p.m. to compete or, they can email Rev. Jen in advance.

The chosen Monarch will also receive a slice of pizza from Rosario's, a 6-pack of Budweiser and the knowledge that he has been chosen by the people. Runner-up will receive the dubious title of Mr. Tribeca and will get to wear a smaller vagina-shaped crown throughout the year.

Prizes will also be awarded for "Best Male Tits," "Best Nutsack" and congeniality. Appearances by past Mr. Lower East Sides and musical acts will make the evening especially magical.

The 20th Annual Mr. Lower East Side Pageant
Saturday, March 23, 8 p.m.
Bedlam, 40 Avenue C near Third Street
$10 (free for competitors)

* One Mr. LES Pageant historian is disputing this claim, noting that this may only be the the 19th-and-a-half installment of the pageant, given that the 17th edition was stopped while still in the first round.

Previously on EV Grieve:
At the annual Mr. Lower East Side Pageant (in Queens)

1 comment:

Eden Bee said...

The best event of the year!